Sad News To Report

My heart is heavy tonight. Sadly I just learned that my MS150 CHAMP had recently passed away after a 30 year battle with MS. I received an email from her husband telling me the sad news. I couldn't believe it as I was reading his email. I really was looking forward to a reply from her cuz I had handwritten a letter to her as oppose to just sending her an email. I thought it would put a smile on her face to receive a handwritten letter, something ppl don't do enough of anymore.
I'm really sadden by this news. I really don't know how to react. Tears are filling my eyes and my nose is starting to stuff. I don't even know this person but it still hurts knowing that she lost the fight to MS. It really changes my outlook in life and for the MS150 ride this weekend. I feel like I've got nothing or nobody to bike for. Nevertheless, I'm still going to bike for her. In her memory and honor. I might cry a lil along the way, but it's all going to be for her now.
But I really do feel alone on this ride. It's sad that I've got very few support from what I call friends. Now I know who are my real friends and who aren't. A friend was suppose to be there for me as I ride in the first day, but she was sent out of the country for business in Spain, so she won't be there. My cousin was suppose to come, but she past me up for Buzz Fest. Yeah...some cousin she is. Now I know where I stand. And now my CHAMP is in a better place so she won't get to see me finish this ride for her. Or maybe she still will...hopefully looking down and pushing me along to finish the ride. Gosh...I really hate these diseases that is so incurable. It really makes me think twice about life and just to live it cuz I am blessed to have the opportunity to do so and be so healthy at the same time.
But my heart is heavy tonight. I better rest up now. I need to let this all set in and not take it so hard. After all...she is without pain now. That will help me sleep some tonight.

Jury Duty

So I reported for jury duty today and when I walked into the assembly room there was this beautiful girl sitting just at the end of the row, but I had been walking behind a few ppl so I didn't expect to see her until I was there. I was able to get in a smile to her and to receive hers in return. But it was too late for me to try to grab a seat next to her. So instead, I sat two rows behind hoping that she'd be called in the same group as me the entire time.
I'm not sure what she was, but I'm thinking hispanic somehow just from the way she had her hair done. She was very light skinned though. She was of a very thin and petite build with short body waved brown-reddish hair. Obviously colored cuz I could see she had brown roots. Anyhow...she was about the cutest thing that has really captured my attention in a while. She didn't look just like another plain Jane, but something about her just made her look really fresh. I know that's a weird way to describe someone, but that's what kept going through my mind. She looked so alive and just so different from what I'm used to seeing I guess...
Well...as we all sat in that assembly room, I just kept hoping that we'd be in the same group so I could talk to her. I was for real on this one. I was not going to let another opportunity go by. But I never got that second opportunity. I was called out before she was and was never able to catch up with her after. Man...this was one that I wish I'd have back. I don't normally wish that...I'm usually good at letting things go, but I really would like to have this one back so I could have gone back and sat next to her.
So back to the jury duty...I wasn't selected cuz I honestly couldn't be fair in the particular trail. It involved doctors and lawsuit and I hated both. I already have that predetermination in my mind so I thought it would have been best to take myself out. Whew!!!...dodged another jury selection. But dang if that girl wasn't so cute!!!

Countdown to the BPMS150 Begins!

2 weeks away! Not this coming weekend, but the very next weekend, my ass will be on a bike for 180 miles over 2 days. I can't wait. I hope the weather will be much better than the way it's been these past few days.
Today we picked up our MS150 packet that included our rider number along with a packet of info for the race and what to expect on that day. Anyhow...blah blah blah. My number is 7502. Not exactly a great number but I'll take it. It's a nice solid number. Well...it really started kicking in that I'm doing this bike ride as I was picking up my packet when I got around to picking up a bandana with the name of the person that I will be riding for. The person is someone living with MS and someone that I have never met before. Her name is Cathy Montgomery. It'll be interesting if I were able to meet her, but I doubt that will happen although I'm suppose to contact her and what not. But the pressure is really on for myself. I really feel compelled to do this ride and to complete it all the way through. I've got people who've donated crazy amount of money on my behalf so I really don't want to let any of them down. I know it's just pressure I put on myself, but maybe I need to do this to push myself to complete this cuz I know it's going to be a very painful experience...at least from what everyone keeps telling me. In my head, things will go smoothly, but at the same time my head also knows what the possibility could be.
As far as contacting my person, I know I will. Just don't know when yet. Maybe this weekend. I just hope it won't be weird.